My eyes were closed mostlyBut it didn't matter much anywaySome tasks do not require sightOnly that you feelAnd man...did I feel The ebb and flow of pain followed by a little reliefBut not much - anticipatory respiteTo assure me the pain was comingAgainPanic, sheer panicWith legs sprawledModesty gone out the windowOf one of the most beautiful days in NovemberA beautiful Carolina November dayMimicking a day just three years beforeWhere the weather was the sameBut today....today was not the sameToday I would add a new person to the worldToday I did woman's workTrading in white for blood redFlowers for true bloomRings for fireTaking a hand...for giving a breathShe's coming!  We can see her head!Blasphemy!  (I could FEEL her head)And then a whisper......In a tone below the frequency of all others in earshotOnly you can push her outOnly you...So.  Push! Photography by Ella Jardim